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             THE BLAST

Blast #191

4/13/2017

1 Comment

 
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​                                                            Easter Egg Roll
                                                        Conspiracy Theory
 
          While Syria, Russia, and NATO have dominated the headlines this week another important story has been roiling around in the background: Monday’s “Easter Egg Roll” on the South Lawn of the White House and the apparent lack of preparation by the Trump team.  While the Egg Roll cannot hold a candle to serious international affairs, it is, according to Bill Clinton’s Easter organizer Melinda Bates: “the single most high-profile event that takes place at the White House each year, and the White House and the first lady are judged on how well they put it on.” From her perspective, the outcome of the event is an indication of the administration’s inner workings. (Salon, April 11, Rachel Leah).  Apparently, from what everyone’s reporting, the preparations were slow in coming and the results will be a “smaller” event than in the past (something I’m sure the Prevaricator-in-Chief will deny, claiming twice as many attended this year’s event as in the past, no doubt).

              According to Salon (and supported by NYTimes reporting) on April 11:
 
The public schools in the Washington area have heard nothing from the White House, even though they are typically allocated up to 4,000 tickets for children.
What about military families, which used to account for 3,000 tickets?
“Unfortunately, the Trump administration has not reached out about it,” Ashley Broadway-Mack, the president of the American Military Partner Association told the Times.  Congress members have also not been contacted about tickets for their constituents.

PBS Kids, which provides the costumes for the event, was also late to know of the White House’s plans. Because of the tardy requests, they will only be providing one “Sesame Street” character this year.
 

       So, no Elmo or Curious George, et al, and possibly no Washington, D.C. schoolchildren or Congressional families?  According to the NY Times (also April 11th):

The evidence points to a quickly thrown-together affair that people close to the planning said would probably draw about 20,000 people — substantially smaller than last year’s Easter Egg Roll, which drew 37,000. It will be staffed by 500 volunteers, half the usual.
 

                The Easter Egg Roll is the bailiwick of the First Lady but, as we all know, FLOTUS is ensconced in her golden tower in New York City (costing taxpayers $150,000 per day) and has barely hired an East Wing staff (not unlike her husband, of course, who is lagging far, far behind in hiring Executive branch officials).  According to Salon, again:
 
Much of the discrepancy in this year's slow planning seems to fall on the absence of the First Lady in Washington. Mrs. Trump, who lives in New York, has not enacted a full-staff for the East Wing, and such members have typically been responsible for leading the Easter festivities.
“She named a chief of staff and social secretary in early February but has yet to announce a director for the Visitors Office, normally the crucial player in the daunting execution of the event,” the Times reported.

 
                    So, while it is not a “yuge” event in terms of international, or even national, affairs, it is a reflection of the more troubling aspect of disorganization and, dare I say it, laziness on the part of POTUS and FLOTUS, a couple that has never had to do an honest day’s work in their lives!  Yet I sense a little bit of a diabolical turn behind the scenes regarding the Easter Egg Roll and let me be the first to float this Easter Egg Roll Conspiracy Theory, hoping to beat Breitbart to the punch.  If Steve Bannon is given his walking papers this week and returns to Breitbart with his tail between his legs, I fully expect this story to hit the front pages of that august publication: White House Jews Undermine the Bunny.  Yes, Bannon & Breitbart will surely pin the failure of the Easter Egg Roll on Jared Kushner and Ivanka Trump, the observant Jews in the White House!  Imagine this lead in Breitbart:

"As they enjoyed their Passover Seder on Tuesday night, the First Jews were already gleefully delighting in undermining the age-old Easter pageant on the South Lawn.  Ivanka told Melania everything was “under control” while Jared threw up a smokescreen in front of The Donald and, BAM!, the deed was done.  The insidious, globalist conspiracy that was already interfering with our America First agenda had struck again --- and this time at the heart of little children who only wanted to search for those lovely wooden eggs on the White House lawn.”

                 Oh, I know there are skeptics out there who won’t believe this but just wait.  As the evidence leaks out and as Breitbart begins revving up its Bannon engine, you can bet that Monday’s Easter Egg Roll will push Syria, Russia, and NATO off the front pages by Tuesday morning, with all the a.m. talk shows yammering about this "incredible disaster" right in the President’s back yard.
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                Just remember:  you heard it here first.
 
 
 
 


1 Comment
Delbert
4/15/2017 08:59:14 am

Love this theory! Possibly satirical, but not far-fetched. And a scandal "right in his back yard."

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  • Home
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  • Creating Democratic Schools
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